Did this meat come from a dead animal?

I just got done reading a book called the long run. It is about a NY firefighter who was a marathon runner and an Iron man finisher.  In 2005 he got hit by a bus and it changed his life forever.  Anyway the just of the story was overcoming obstacles.  I will always remember Matt Long and his story for as long as I live.  you can YouTube Matt long and get a glimpse of his life.  It was a pretty good book and reminded me that even in tough times there are others out there who are really struggling.

Today wasn't the best of days with me and the kids.  I picked up Cam and Cayden from school early to take them to the dentist.  I was in such a rush that I forgot the paper work and had to reschedule.  I am not a big fan of kids not minding in public.  As a matter of fact I'm not a big fan of kids acting out anytime.  Well I asked the boys to put their shoes on and stop playing on the little gym they had there.  They didn't listen, they continued to play.  I finally got them out and gave them a stern lecture.  Well then we went to the grocery store and I had to ask them over and over to stop playing.  I finally told them that when they get home they are going to have to sit on their beds until they gave me a good apology and told me that they would start acting good.  They finally started acting well and we had a good time afterwards. 

At dinner I cooked steak.  While we were eating Cayden asked if this was from a dead animal.  We explained that all meat in from some sort of animal.  The look on his face was priceless....

Rebecca and I had some quiet time tonight on the porch.  For the first time since we got the boys we sat outside in the cool breeze and drank a glass of wine.  It was great being able to just sit down and talk like adults...

I hope tomorrow goes well.  I go back to work so Rebecca will have all the kids for the first time at night and in the morning.  It should be interesting.

I truly hope that all of this works out well.  I hope that these kids are reunited with their parents and have a wonderful life.

To be continued...

I hate wiping poop

One of my first runs as a firefighter was to a house where an old man slipped in the shower.  As we walked into the house I could smell the smell of someone who had pooped.  I almost puked as soon as we made our way into the bathroom.  Well it was my job as the low man to help this guy up and make sure he was ok and get him back into the shower.

I don't even like wiping my kids backsides.  When both girls were in diapers I dreaded changing the diapers.  I can handle the blood, the guts and the puke but the poop is something that really gets me going. 

With one of these boys that is staying with us being 3, I have to wipe some booties.  It is so strange having to wipe another child's backside.  I am sure i'm going to lose my lunch one of these times.  We were warned that he could destroy a bathroom but MAN this kid is breaking records.   As I thought about this I had to remind myself that he is only 3 years old and still needs help with these types of things. 

The reason that I am writing about poop is that it got me thinking today.  There is someone that needs to read between the lines of this blog to figure out the true meaning.

We will always have to wipe the backsides of others (figuratively speaking of course).  There are going to be times in life that we have to do things that we dread.  It may be someone we know, someone close to us or it may be a complete stranger but there will be times when we have to wipe...It isn't always pleasant but we still have to wipe. 

It has been a couple of good days at the Rhodes house.  The boys (I hope) are really adjusting to their new surroundings.  We haven't had too much of a problem getting them to go to bed and they seem to be doing great at school. 

I have a wonderful daughter.  Today when I got home she had a homework assignment that asked  "if you could be someone famous, who would it be"  her answer said me (as in herself).  I asked her why she said herself and she stated that she didn't want to be anyone else but who she is!  It is one of the proudest moments of my life. 

I am ready to get back to the fire station.  It has been a few weeks now and I look forward to getting back and it is not because of the boys and the chaos going on here.  I just miss being at work. I miss being around the guys and joking.  I miss acting like I'm 15 and getting to save lives.  It will be strange walking back into the firehouse after being off for so long but I'm sure they guys will make my transition easy and uncomfortable.  I truly have the greatest job in the world, I am a pretty smart guy, could have been a doctor a lawyer or anything else I wanted to be and I wouldn't change my career path for anything. 

To be continued....

?

I really dont have much to say tonight. I have a headache and really just want to go to bed.

The lesson I want to teach the boys is this..God made them they way they are...they are perfect in His eyes..Nothing more nothing less...The more we are around these kids I am realizing what was missing in their lives....They need encouragement...they need structure....they need direction.  Both of these kids love to please others, so much that they tell little white lies to make themselves look better.  Today I was a Coach at Texas Tech in Cayden's eyes (and that is strange because I really do have a great job).  His teacher explained they he tells these little stories to make himself look and feel better about himself.  The lesson I am going to work on is teaching him that he doesn't need to do that.  HE IS PERFECT! 

Encourage your children.  Give them positive reinforcement.  We are so good at telling them when they are doing wrong but we fail to praise them when we are doing well.  IT IS A MUST!

My neighbor came over today and asked how things were going.  The first response that came to my mind was a honest one....."raising kids is easy, it's just time consuming and stressful".  That is my story....It takes time, it takes money, it takes being unselfish, it is a full time job.  Being selfish is the reason people have failed their children....It is easy to put you kids in front of a T.V. or let them do what they want....It is hard to take time out of your day and spend time with them... to wake up a little early to make their lunch, to stay up a little later to read them a story.  But the juice is worth the squeeze!

Mom left today and it made me sad.  I sure am blessed to have had someone love me so much. 

The boys did well at school today.  They woke up on time and went to bed with no problems.  Overall it was a great day.

To be continued....

I dont mess around when it comes to goulash

I have always had this ability to win staring contest...It is one of my abilities that I am proud of.  When I was in the military we would play the staring game and I have never been beaten.  It helped me out a lot when I worked at the fire academy and some knucklehead student need a butt chewing.  I could keep a straight face the entire time.  It is one of those silly things about myself that I am kind of proud of.  My technique is flawless...See I'm a rattle snake.  I have a mean streak in me that could match almost anyone.  The thing about my mean streak is I have almost always been able to contain it.  Because of the many things I have seen in my life, I can literally turn it on a off and when I get in a staring contest I can look someone in the eyes and truly HATE them for that moment.  It is only through my ability to realize that anger doesn't solve anything and by the Grace of God that I am able to control this...

The reason I say this is because I lost a staring contest today to a 5 year old.  Not only did I lose, I lost 3 times.  This kid was flawless.. I would roll and cross my eyes and he was dead straight serious.  He never smiled, never flinched, never wavered.  He beat me.  It got me thinking of Cayden.  What is going on in his head while we play?  Is he like me and able to truly control his emotions?  Does he have thoughts of hate while we play or is he just able to maintain a serious look?  Sounds silly huh?  Well as I thought about this all day (it bothered me that I lost) I figure it is a positive.  If you can use your mind to control your emotions then you should be able to use your mind to control everything that goes on in your life.  I thought about how he could overcome what is going on in his life right now, how he could do anything he wants if he truly puts his mind to it....I know it sounds silly but I believe the mind is the most powerful thing in the world...

The best thing about mom being here is that she can't sit down.  Our family has it's ups and downs but I can honestly say that most everyone in our family would sacrifice everything they have in order to please others....they would give you the shirt of their back at anytime.  Mom is the type of person that would sleep outside just to make sure we are comfortable inside.  Well when she is here we dont have to do anything (not that we dont try).  Dinner is cooked, clothes are washed, dishes are done.  It's just the way she is and it's awesome.

Tonight at dinner she made goulash...We all sat down to eat and Cayden with his country accent said "I dont mess around when it comes to goulash". It was one of the funniest things I have ever heard.....We have had a great couple of days. Yesterday was my B-day and mom watched the kids while Rebecca and I went out. It was nice.  Today we played all day long and rode bikes tonight.  Both boys went to bed well the last two nights.  I hope they are getting into a great routine and that makes it easier on us. 

School starts back tomorrow. Week two will be great.

To be continued...

Today was a good day

No matter what stage you are in your life or where you live, you always miss your momma. I have lived all over the world and in many different states. I have met thousands of people and I can honestly say that my mother is the most unique. I can't remember anyone I have met in all my travels that is as hardworking as she is. It is something that has stuck with me since I was a child when I realized she was raising us alone. Fast forward many years later and she is still the same. She comes to visit and can't sit still, she wants to make sure we are ok. While we don't expect or ask her, when she comes and visits our house is cleaner than it ever is, we have meals cooked and clothes washed. She is truly an amazing woman and a huge reason I am the way I am today..Thanks mom.

We had a pretty good day today. All the kids got up on time and ready for school. I believe that parents are partial to their own kids. I know my kids are good kids, I see it everyday. It is when others tell me that my kids are good that confirms my belief. Well today when I went to pick up Cayden one of the Kinder teachers stopped me in the hall (not his) and told me that she just loves Cayden. She mimicked(sp?) his country accent and said he was a SUPER kid. I see his potential and hope he reaches it.

All week we have been telling the boys that we were going to the high school game. Well tonight was the night. The crowd was loud, the light were bright and the players were ready! The boys were so excited to go and when we pulled up they were really excited. I haven't seen a smile on these boys faces this big since they got here. For 3 quarters they yelled, cheered and smiled. It was a great night. Cam looked at me and said "this is the biggest stadium that I've ever seen". I can't wait until next week when we go to the Tech game. It will blow their mind.

Tomorrow we will be hanging out and playing outside a lot....I hope that we can build on the momentum of today into next week.

to be continued.....

The ups and downs of life

When I was 18 I took a trip to Mexico with my college roommate.  He was from the valley and took us across to the many wonderful cities that our great state border.  If you have ever been down there you know what I am talking about.  I remember when we crossed the border that my first thought was how poor these people are.  I vividly remember getting lost in Reynosa and traveling the back roads of the city in the middle of the night.  I vividly remember seeing a tin house with a single light bulb hanging in the middle of the room.  The reason this image is trapped in my mind is because there were about 4 or 5 little kids laying on the floor.  I remember the young kids as young as 6 or 7 selling gum on the sidewalk to the American party goers in the middle of the night.  I left Mexico on the first trip thinking "man I have been really blessed my entire life".  We didn't live in the biggest home, or had the biggest cars or the money to do many things, but compared to those who live south of the border we were rich....It is a lesson I have tried to remind myself my entire life....

The boys had their best day yet waking up and getting ready for school.  We didn't have to cajole them at all.  The only bad thing is that both of them had Doctors appointments and didn't get to school until after lunch.  These are healthy boys (although a little short!) Cayden was 3'5 and 43lbs while Cam was 3ft and 37lbs.  I got them to the doctor and back to school in time to meet Rebecca for lunch.  After lunch I went and picked up mom from the airport.  She is kind of going through the same thing we are right now.  On a normal visit, mom is able to come here and unwind.  She is able to just relax in the quietness of our home.  This is not the case anymore!  It was funny on the way to dinner tonight every kid in the car was talking to her and she had a look on her face like "I need more ears".  I really am glad she is here and I know the girls are excited to see her.  She is so great around our girls. 

Cayden wanted some iced tea today and I would not let him have it.  I'm not a big fan of giving kids sweets just because they want them.  It's not that I am cruel, I just don't think they need it.  Well he got upset with me and started pouting.  My first thought was Mexico.  I pulled up some pictures of kids who would not only love some iced tea but would die for just a sip of water.  I think it hit home because his attitude change immediately. 

The great thing about Lubbock is the evenings.  It cools off here pretty well so tonight we decided to hang out outside.  My friend brought over a bike for the boys the day they got here.  Cayden jumped on it like he had been exposed to riding a bike before.  I didn't think much of it.  He wasn't able to really ride but he tried and tried.  Well tonight was different.  He jumped on the bike and took off.  He didn't make it far before he fell and got up and tried again.  I noticed he really wanted to ride so I grabbed him behind his seat and pushed him.  10 minutes later is was riding all by himself.  He was so proud.  Cam had a great day.  I haven't been around very many young kids but if we could multiply him our world would be a better place.  This kid has a huge heart.

Tomorrow night is football night.  We are going to watch the Tigers play.  I am excited to have some male companionship with me at the games.  It should be a fun day.

To be continued.....

Clearing my head

When I first started blogging it was to clear my mind. It was an intimate detail of what was going on in this sometimes crazy head.  It was a way to vent to myself about myself. It was a way to talk to God and put my thoughts on papers.  Expressing myself in ink so that I could check my progress or lack there of.  Blogging was my outlet...and there wasn't anyone who read that blog. 

Now I have people reading and I miss the ability to express myself.  I thought about it long and hard today and have decided to continue to express myself.  This has been my outlet for years and I plan on continuing.

We have a rule in our house that goes something like this.  If you do something wrong you get in trouble....if you do something wrong and lie to us about it you will get in serious trouble.  It is our way of teaching the girls that it is better to take responsibilities for their actions and get in a little bit of trouble rather than hiding things and getting caught later and being in serious trouble.  I believe it is a work in progress but it is working.

I love my family and we have some wonderful qualities but we also have a major flaw...It has been passed down for generations. Slowly and surely many of us are recognizing this flaw and making steps to eliminate it.  Dont get me wrong, this doesn't pertain to everyone.  This flaw is the ability to cover things up, we are fast talkers, we can deceive, we can lie, we can talk our way out of almost anything...

It took me a lot of years to realize that if I did things the right way and took responsibility for my actions, there would be less pain, less heartache and less turmoil in the long run.  Dont get me wrong, I still make mistakes and try to cover them up, but in the back of my mind I know that I am wrong and need to confess.  Even when I try and cover something up, it eats at me until I have to fess up. 

The reason this is on my mind is I dont want to pass this flaw to my children.  I dont want my kids to have the ability to cover things up, to be deceitful.  I have learned that this type of behavior can be passed down at an early age and I am curious as to how much of this my oldest has seen.  My question now is how do you reverse it?  How do you teach someone that already has it ingrained in their minds that it is ok to tell stories? That it is ok lie? 

My prayer tonight is that the trends of our past can be erased....that those who haven't learned to accept themselves as who they are and take responsibility for their actions can do so....that we can reverse this flaw that many in my family have so that it doesn't impact the future generations. 

Both boys had a good morning.  Cam woke up before his alarm clock and that beautiful smile was glowing.  Cayden slept through the alarm but woke up quickly after.  Both boys got ready for school and were excited about going.  The report is that school went well for both boys. 

The evening was a little rough.  When Cayden talks to April he really starts missing her.  I understand this but not on his level.  It is tough figuring out away to comfort him.  It is truly going to be a struggle if things do not change.  We continue to shower him with love and grace.  I truly hate seeing his broken heart....

Tomorrow mom is coming into town and we are really looking forward to it.  She has already said that she wants to watch the kids so that Rebecca and I get a chance to go out on a date!!! I can't wait!

To be continued......

The good the bad and the ugly

I had one of the greatest compliments I have ever received given to me today.  A person I know that is taking parenting classes called me today to explain how the classes are going.  He stated that they are teaching the exact things that we do to raise our children.  It made my day for two reasons. 1) I am glad he is learning new things about parenting and 2) for some reason, Rebecca and I have a knack for this.  Anyway it really made my day.

Our kids wake up to an alarm clock.  When it goes off, they get up without problem.  Cam and Cayden are not used to it yet!  The alarm when off at 645 and they slept straight through it.  I let it go off for about 5 minutes and they didn't move. 

Cam started school today and looked super cute.  For some reason these boys feel that pink and purple are limited to girls only.  Yesterday I wore my pink polo to show that they can be manly.  When Cam got up today he said he wanted to wear his pink polo.....so he did.  Rebecca dropped him off and said he acted shy at first.  When she picked him up, he said he had fun and the staff said he was great.

Cayden really enjoyed his second day of kindergarten.  His teacher said he was a little tired today but he was awarded for his good behavior with the option to pick something out of the treasure box.  He got to go to the box again for helping clean the class room without being asked.  It makes me proud when kids take initiative and he was rewarded tonight. 

Mehkya also had a great day at school.  She really loves her new teacher. I think she is starting to get used to having the boys here but she still misses her privacy.

Bed time went pretty smooth tonight. The room the boys are using used to be our office/gym.  We never put curtains up because we were rarely in there.  The windows face west and it is very bright in there and makes bed time tough, so I found my inner ghetto and hooked up the master piece in the picture below.  We are having a guy come out to put window shades up tomorrow.  Cam got in a little bit of trouble at bed time and started to cry.  When they get in trouble their fall back is missing their mommy.  I understand that but we dont let it fly at our house.

Thanks for all the advice about talking to the kids.  It seems to help. 

All in all it was a good day. 

To be continued....

Being eaten out of house and home

I remember one summer when I lived with Mark and Rosie that I got my first experience with working cattle.  For anyone that has never done this, it went down this way.  All the hands gathered in a circle to coral the cattle.  When a cow tried to escape the circle they would get popped with a bull whip to get them back in line with the herd.  I NEED A BULLWHIP!!!!

Ok just joking it's not that bad, but today when I had all the kids in the house after school, this was the memory that came to mind. 

Mehkya and Cayden started school today.  Kmac 3rd and Cayden K.  It was pretty ho hum for Mehkya.  She has the routine down now.  She sure looked cute though.  Cayden got over his lack of excitement.  You could tell he was nervous when he walked through the door, but when I picked him up he had a huge smile on his face.  He said he really enjoyed it and his teacher told us tonight that he did really well.  I was proud to see that he did great. 

Night time has been tough on Cayden.  Every night he starts crying and missing his momma.  I am running out of ways to comfort him.  If anyone has any ideas please let me know.  I am pretty much black and white and my reaction is to tell him that he is going to be here for a while and there isn't anything anyone can do about, so stop crying and go to bed, but I know I can't say that.  Tonight was tough but I think he is pretty tired.  At last check both boys are sound asleep. 

Cam and I hung out today.  We dropped the kids off and headed to the gym.  He was nervous about going to the kids club but when I picked him up he said he had a good time.  At our gym there is this big trampoline with webbing that goes up about 8 flights.  You can climb the webbing all the way to the top.  He really enjoyed it.  He wasn't able to get to the third level because of his size but he tried hard.  Many times he would fall all the way back down, laughing, and trying again.  I will say this about Cam, when he is tired he isn't much fun to be around.  He need and took a nap today.  Another thing about Cam (and I was warned) is that boy can EAT!!  I thought Kennedy was a hungry child but goodness, Cam is going to eat us out of house and home!

My next semester of school started today and I am still without books.  It has been a frustrating few weeks dealing with the VA, but I am thankful my school is being paid for.  I only have 4 classes left to finish my Masters in Christian Education and I am ready to be D U N.....

I'm leaving tonight saying how amazing my wife is.  She is the definition of strength.

To be continued....

Big day tomorrow

This is the most beautiful picture in the world....Not because it is Kennedy but because it says so much.  Remember when you had a faith like this?  A child like faith where you believed because you believed. My favorite thing about this picture is the joy on her face while she prays...She doesn't know what she is doing but she is taking the first step in trusting the unseen.  I look at this photo and pray that I can have faith like a child.

My baby girl starts 3rd grade tomorrow!  Every year it makes me wish that she was still a toddler.  I know that every year she gets older and closer to leaving the nest.  It reminds me that every day I need to spend more and more time with her, showing her affection because that day is nearing when she won't let me jump in the bed with her or grab her and give her long tight hugs.  I am so proud of her and know that she will do amazing things with her life.

Cayden starts kinder tomorrow as well.  I sure hope his lack of excitement is a facade.  I dont really know that he understands what is going on. That tomorrow is the first step towards his future.  I am sure he will do fine once he gets used to being around new kids, new teacher, new school ect....I'm looking forward to seeing him grow as a student.  It will be fun to watch. 

We really didn't do much today because of the preparation for tomorrow.  We took everyone out for ice cream and the boys and I stopped by the firestation to meet the guys.   We did get to skype with Candi and her family for a bit.  All the kids enjoyed it.  I'll be sure to post plenty of pictures of the school kids tomorrow.

to be continued...

So fresh, So Clean.....and Boys with Earrings

I have a theory on parenting that goes a little something like this.
--Always praise more than you re-buke
--Always be positive even when you dont feel like it
--Discipline is a must but not out of anger
--Explain why they are being disciplined
--Integrity is a must
--Take responsibility for your actions
--Initiative goes a long way!
--Education is important
--That it is ok to fail some times
--The right way is the easiest way in the long run
--Understand who Jesus is
--Pray together
--Never judge
--Be open and honest
--To be a parent, not a friend or buddy
and the list could continue for a long time.

I am not so ignorant to believe that my kids will always do the right thing.  I understand they will make mistakes, they will follow the crowd, they will question my authority and they will lose sight of the important things in life at one point or another. I am confident though that when they make these mistakes, they will know exactly where we stand on whatever the issue is, that the first thought that comes into their mind will be our reaction....I am not and never will be the perfect father, but I am sure that my kids will always know where I stand on issues and my stance on most issues are unwavering...



Today was a pretty good day in our neck of the woods.  We woke up and ate cinnamon rolls and fruit.  We all got cleaned up and I took the boys to get hair cuts while Rebecca and the girls went to the gym....

I remember the first time Mehkya saw a boy with long hair. She was about 2 years old and in the walmart checkout line she yell's out "momma that boy has hair like a girl".  I am sure everyone has stories that relate to this comment.  Today at the barber shop a little boy came and played in the play area with the boys.  This kid had an earring and Camryn stopped playing, took a long hard look and yelled out "Cayden, that boy has an earring!"  I almost died from laughter.  The look on his face was priceless!  Needless to say I brought him over and explained that some kids do different stuff than others and we were cool.  The boys got their hair did and we headed home.

I had to hang a closet rod in the boys room for their clothes so the boys helped me with this project.  It went pretty smooth.

As I have stated we have been blessed with great friends.  Today we had visitors and ate hot dogs while all the kids played.  The trip was cut short for me and the boys due to the football fan day at the college so we bounced and headed towards Tech.

This was a fun trip.  I bought the boys some tech hats and we went from table to table getting autographs from the 2011-2012 Texas Tech football team.  The guys were gracious and put on a good show for the kids.  They now have hats signed by all of the team.  The boys really enjoyed seeing these mountain of men and I was amazed how small you look next to a 6'6 260lb football player. 

While we were there we saw the Tech Cheerleaders.  They must have caught Cayden's eye because as soon as some of them smiled at them he wanted his picture taken....Cam just ran off and hid....he didn't want any part of these girls hugging on him.....


Not to be outdone though, we made it to the volleyball table so I could get their autographs for Mehkya....They were signing her poster and we were about half way down the table when like a bolt of lighting Camryn tossed his hat to this beautiful petite girl on the team.  He had the biggest smile on his face as she signed his hat and gave him a high five.  I guess he knows his type! (and I have to agree she was the best looking one). 

We got home and headed to church tonight.  You can read the dunked blog about that.  The boys seemed to enjoy church and I look forward to expanding that part of their lives. 

The kids are starting to interact with each other.  Kennedy is really enjoying Camryn and Mehkya is getting really annoyed by Cayden...I'm sure all big sisters understand this.  I'm pretty impressed by how much they have played together and how well they are getting a long....

Bed time was a little tougher tonight.  I'm starting to get a good feel for what makes the boys tick.  It's Cayden that got to me tonight.  You can tell he has an idea about what is going on.  I truly hope that he can be reunited with his parents as soon as possible.  All kids need their parents....

I'll leave you with this.
The greatest thing I feel I can do for my kids is have them believe in themselves.  We tell Mehkya every night that she can talk to us about anything at anytime.  I tell her daily that the only opinions that matters are hers, ours and mostly Jesus.  I want her to be confident in who she is so that when peer pressure comes she will be strong enough to make good choices....It is the same with these boys.  One of my new goals is to teach these boys that they dont have to impress anyone but themselves and God.  That they are perfectly made and if someone says otherwise they are idiots.  I want them to realize that they can do anything they want with their lives.  This is my prayer....

To be continued.....

Dunked

Tonight was the craziest church service I have evern been to...The entire church staff had on blue shirts that said dunked...the message was called dunked.  We sang as we normally do and Chris started speaking.  It was obvious that the message was about Baptism. 

I was baptized in October of 1987.  The reason I remember the date is because I had the First Baptist Church of Malakoff look it up once.  I am a believer that baptism is a sign that you have gien your life to Christ.  I do not believe it is necessary for salvation, but I do believe it is an important part of our faith.  The problem with October of 1987 is that I didn't become a Christian until 1994....Sure I prayed the prayer and asked God into my heart in 87, but the reason was because a person I looked up to got baptized a few weeks earlier and I thought it was the thing to do.

As a Christian I believe it is hard to put a date on "when" you recieved salvation.  Some people can remember the exact date and dont get me wrong that is awesome.  For me I know it was in 94, because that is when, for the first time, I felt the Holy spirit fill me up.  It was the first time I truly decided to change my life and walk with God, to let Him guide my thoughts and actions.  Have I messed up? YES!  But it is during the time when I have messed up that I am reassured that I have the Holy Spirit in me......

fast forward to 2011...I have always felt the "need" to be baptized again because I never really knew WHY I was baptized...I didn't have an option tonight.  Pastor Chris gets up and speaks about Acts 10:36 (look it up). Basically it's a story of people accepting Christ and getting baptized afterwords....Chris got up and said tonight is the night to get baptized...TONIGHT????? I thought!  Then he explained that the church was providing clothes, underwear (new), shorts, shirts for the men....shorts, shirts, panties, hair dryers, make up, hair spray, mirrors and get this.....femine products for the women...He erased any excuses we had about being in our own clothes...At first I thought this is NUTS, but then the Holy Spirit worked in me.  He said, "Justin this is your time"  take the plunge and get dunked!  I had to listen.  I had to swallow my pride and say it was time.  Here I am a 33 yo male that is 9 hours away from a seminary degree dressed up to get baptized.  Come on in the water is fine.....

Rebecca was there with me.  She was young in her faith when she accepted Christ and I had the opportunity to baptize her in 2003....There were some concerns about her baptizm back then and has always wanted to do it the right way...She was there by my side as we were both dunked as a confession of faith..Both of us, pride swallowed, Christians for years taking the humble walk to the pool at our church....

Is it a new beggining?  I don't think so, it is just doing it right...Being able to explain to our kids what went on today and why so that they can make that choice on their own and not be influenced by others walk.

Aug 20, 2011 a Christian of 18 years finally took the plunge and was dunked. 

Asparagus tales

I'm going to bullet point how today went before I start writing.

-Kids woke me up earlier than I wanted to wake
-I cooked pancakes by request
-Rebecca went to work
-We took Cayden's shoes back and exchanged them for a bigger size
-Because of their good behavior we went to the science spectrum
-We ate lunch then played Kinect while Kennedy slept.
-Rebecca came home
-we ate pork chops, corn bread, and asparagus (more on this later)
-We watched RIO and ate pop corn

I ventured into the great unknown today.  Rebecca had to work so I decided to take on the task of taking all four kids around town.  I have more appreciation for those of you who have multiple kids than you will ever know.  I wanted to see if I could do it.  It reminded me of when I am scheduled for a long run while training for a marathon...I DREAD starting and have to convinced myself to suck it up and start placing one foot in front of the other.  Needless to say, just like my long runs, it didn't kill me. 

We had to take Cayden's shoes back because school starts on Monday. Due to their good behaviour I decided to take them to the science spectrum.  They truly enjoyed the exhibits and I enjoyed explaining to all the kids how certain things worked and why.  Just like my long runs, when I am finished I feel very rewarded, I had the same feeling today.  I realize that while life with four kids will be different I understand that they are still just kids and you treat them the same way you would if it was just one kid (dont touch this, dont push that, stop running in the aisle ect...)

A little side note that I have to write about....We bought Mehkya the kinect game wipeout and played if for a long time last night.  If you have see the show, you know there is an obstacle called big balls.  Well I guess the game was in her head, because at about 11:30 last night she slept walk into our room.  We asked her what was wrong and she she just could not get pass the big red balls (insert joke here) and walked back into her room.

One of our concerns with this process was the change in diet.  We have taught our kids to eat what we cook and we tend to eat fairly healthy.  Tonight we had pork chops, corn bread and asparagus.  The looks on the boys faces when they saw the asparagus was priceless.  I was convinced they would never try it.  We explained that we were going to have a movie night and the only way you get to watch the movie was to eat all your food.  After the initial "I dont want it" both boys gave it a shot (a little convincing by telling them that it would grow their muscles helped), they ate all of their asparagus.  As a matter of fact, Camryn told me that he liked it!

We did have to get on to Cayden today.  For some reason he decided to punch and kick the walls.  I set him in time out for 5min and we discussed why you dont do that.  After that he was fine. Both boys are really starting to react to positive reinforcement.  After they do something that makes them proud, the ask if we are proud of them.  Their little faces light up when we praise them and I truly feel that a few more weeks of this and they will enjoy doing the right thing. 

I must say we have some amazing friends.  We have been blessed beyond measure with support.  The boys now have more clothes than we know what to do with.  Today when I was making Camryn try on pants, he leaned over me looking at the top of my head.  He gave me a strange look at asked "why do you not have much hair on the back of your head?"  Man I started laughing...Kids say the funniest things.

My favorite bible verse is John 11:35.  The simplicity of this verse reminds me that we are all so very human.  It has been an important verse in my life and it is helping me through this process.  When I feel stressed I remind myself that these kids are human and need to be treated with respect because the one who these words describe was human and deserves respect, when I am worried, I remind myself that the one who these words describe worried more than I will ever know and when I feel like I am overwhelmed, I am reminded by this simple verse that my problems will never compare to the problems that the one who these words describe came to ease.  My life is blessed!

To be continued....

Day of First!

Well today was a day of first....and....first in a long time.

The day started well for everyone.  I had to wake up early to get my DL renewed so Rebecca got the first taste of waking up and feeding 4 kids!  She handled it like a champ.  I got home and the kids were eating muffins and having a good ole time. 

Camryn and Rebecca had a WIC appointment today so they went East while Mehkya, Kennedy, Cayden and I went West towards the big city of Levelland.   Camryn was not excited about going anywhere with Rebecca and we saw the potential for him throwing a fit.  Once we explained that if you act a certain way you get treated a certain way at our home he was fine.  Rebecca said they had a great day and he was rewarded for his behaviour with a trip to McDonalds.  He was so proud that he didn't cry when the pricked his fingers.

As for the rest of us we made the trip to Levelland to drop off a few things at the in laws storage unit.  Cayden was impressed with the golf cart rides and all the toys at their house.  The In Laws took us to lunch and Cayden learned that sausage was good!  The best thing about this trip was his refusal to eat brisket..... and at the last minute I finally got him to try it out.....first words out of his mouth were "I want more of that stuff" in his little country accent!

We made it home for our meeting with the case worker..I have never been asked so many questions about how I was raised by a stranger.  It brought up emotions that I haven't felt in a while.  I'm assuming the meeting went well.  The kids acted really well during all of this.

Today was a first or many things

- As stated I have never had to discuss how I was raised to a stranger.
Rebecca had to get 4 kids ready for the day
But there were two first that I will remember for the rest of my life

It has been years since I have spoken with my sister.  Because of our immaturity and inability to act like adults we have been on a speak only when need to basis and when we speak it hasn't been pleasant.  Today we mended fences that needed to be mended.  We swallowed our pride and discussed our failures and for the first time in a long time I was reminded that I truly LOVE my brothers and sisters (even the little quirks that drive me crazy)  Family is needed in good times and bad and I realize that now more than ever.  I truly love you sis and am so happy that you are on the path you are on.

The second first is of the picture above.  Today was meet the teacher and Cayden got to meet his Kinder teacher Mrs. Schmidt.  I remember like it was yesterday that Mehkya had her first meet the teacher and I had the same feeling today that I had 3 years ago when she walked into the kinder hall at Bennett elem.  The thought that continued to roam my head was "If anything I do during this time, I want to teach this kid the value of an education"  I truly hope that he learns this important lesson.  His teacher is our neighbor so she will keep us informed about how he is doing for we do not know where he is educationally speaking.  He seems like a sharp kid that needs some guidance.  I'm sure he will do fine.  My only concern was that he didn't seem excited.  Maybe it is because all of this is so new, but I hope next Monday he is happy when he walks through the doors for a lifetime of learning.

As I have with my kids, we pray every night with the boys.  Tonight was no different.  After we prayed I asked them if they understood why we prayed and we got into a lengthy discussion about prayer...They now know almost all the words to "now I lay me".  I also got to explain that when I was a child, my sister taught me this prayer and I prayed this prayer for years and years. (many times I still do).  It's these boys who remind me that I need to have a child like faith and I'm thankful that they are here to remind me of that lesson. 

We ate, showered, brushed teeth and as a reward for having a good day we played wipeout on kinect...talk about ROTFL (is that how it goes?)  It was one of the funniest things I have seen in a while.

I'm continually reminded that no matter how difficult this is, will be, or has been, I have the greatest example of all in Jesus...My prayer tonight is that these boys can see Him through us and no matter if they are here for a few months or years they are reminded of this.

To be continued...

Friends

Just a quick shout out to all of our friends.  We have some amazing friends.  Through all of this we have received an amazing amount of support and Rebecca and I want to say thanks!  How in the world did I get in a position in my life to be completely blessed? 

night time is lonely time

First I want to say that I have a wonderful wife.  She has been so awesome through this....it's a lot to take on and she is doing it with a smile on her face.

Putting the kids to bed is tough.  They jump right in but you can tell that when their minds are not occupied they are thinking of their real home.  Tonight we prayed and got tucked in and they were fine.  A few minutes later, i went in and they had the 1000 yard stare on their little faces.  I asked them what was wrong and Cam said they were sad.  They miss their momma.  I completely understand.  Heck I'm 33 years old and miss my momma.  I told them it was ok to be sad  and that their mom and dad love them.  As I write this, I am not sure if they fell asleep or not.

It was a good day, Lots of shopping for school clothes and Cayden got some shots!  He did not like that at all! 

Tomorrow we have meetings, and more school shopping to do.  It will be an action packed day.

Kennedy and Mehkya are adapting well.  I am not sure that Kennedy really understands yet but she seems to be dealing with it pretty well.  Mehkya has been a huge help.

My only concern with all of this is my girls.  I truly hope I have the strength to spread my time evenly between everyone without neglecting my girls.  The boys need a ton of attention right now, but I have to remind myself that my girls desire that same attention. 

To be continued....

redemption

I can't remember a day that has passed when I have not prayed.  It may have been at night, during the day, the morning, whenever, but I have always believed in prayer. The ones I pray for the most are my mother....Strongest woman I know and my prayer is always something along the lines of give her strength, give her peace and give her faith....She will need all of it now...

The other people I have prayed for the most is my sisters family.  Without detail, I am finally seeing the fruits of my prayers.  It lead to me to a reunion with someone I have spoken to in years.  Maybe we dont understand each other and maybe we never will but we spoke and prayed and shared and it was awesome. It was great seeing that after years and years of prayer, God is creeping into their lives....I pray for their perseverance and that they would continue to seek daily. 

New Surroundings

After the long drive back to Lubbock we finally made it home.  Upon our arrival, Denna and Jerry had picked up Kennedy to meet us at the house.  They had just returned back from Tahoe and had gifts for the girls and the boys. 

Both boys acted like it they have lived here for years.  They walked into the house, checked out their rooms and started playing with their toys.  We went over the "rules" of the house and got settled in.  Pizza was an good idea for the first meal.   Everyone ate and we hung out a bit.  I took the boys to the fire house for a second to check my work schedule and then we met Reb at walmart to pick up some stuff. 

We got home and got the boys bathed, cleaned up for bed, teeth brushed ect...and it was time for bed. 
We figured this would be when it would get rough.  Both boys jumped into bed and we prayed...lights out..no problem!  About 10 min later, Mehkya came in and told us one of the boys had started crying.  Cayden was scared of the dark...we talked a bit and gve them a night light. We discussed that it was ok to cry and miss mommy and daddy, but they were here now and eerything would be ok.  A few minutes later, they were asleep...

The morning came to me hearing a strange noise.  Two boys yelling at each other about who needed to pee first.  We woke, we ate, we shopped and as of right now we are all doing ok.

When we pulled up to the house yesterday I was overcome with emotion.  As happy as I am to have these boys, I will be happier when they are able to return.  It tells me two things....1 Randall and April did what they needed to do and 2, we touched the lives of these two boys. 

To be continued.....

The new beginning

After the 7 hour drive to Athens and the 4 hour court hearing we now have the custody of my two nephew's.  It has been a challenging day between april crying, Randall acting like it doesn't bother him and seeing the boys with the clueless look on their face.  They have no idea that their world is about to be turned upside down. 

They are good boys...a little misguided....but good boys.  I can see their potential.  They need structure, they need love, they need attention.  It is something that we can give them.  We both look forward to the challenge.  I hope that Randall gets his head straight so that they can be re-united with his parents at a later date.  I truly hope it happens.  In the mean time, my prayer is that Rebecca and I give these kids the life they deserve, that we let our light shine and they are drawn to us like a moth to a flame.  This is my prayer.

The greatest thing I admire about this trip is Mehkya.  She has been amazing and it makes me proud knowing that I had something to do with the way she is handling all of this.  She is the maturest 8 year old i've ever met.  She makes me so proud that she is my daughter.  If this is who she will be 10, 20, 30 years from now I will die a happy man.  She is such an amazing person. 

This journey will be difficult but we will persevere!  I know that this is my chance to pay forward the love I was given by those who imprinted my life.  Those like Mark and Rosie, Grand ma dukes and others. 

Until next time.

Rain?

So it has been a long time since we have had any rain in our part of Texas...Well I guess in any part of Texas.  We are longing for rain!  In the past year we have had less than an inch of rain and this has been one of the hottest years on record.  What is going on?  Why are we being deprived of such a necessity such as water?  Can we survive?

This insight came to me the other day.  In OT times when the people of Israel doubted God, disobeyed God or acted foolish in Gods eyes they were punished.  They were punished with drought, plague, famine ect...  Is this God telling us to wake up?  Have we been trying to live without God for so long that He is finally saying "if y'all think you can do it on your own, we shall see"?  It makes sense doesn't it?  We have tried to live our own way forever.  We act as if we don't need God anymore.  We truly believe we can do it on our own.  Look at America...Look at the political system....Look at where our morals are...We are lost!  We never truly turn to God anymore and I feel like this is our punishment.  I know what many will say "God wouldn't do that to us"  but if you look at history He will, He has, and He can!

Come on people it's time to turn to God again.  I dont know how long this drought will happen. I dont know what it will take to Convince God that we are listening, but I fear that if we do not turn to God then the quality of life that we enjoy will be lost.  Does this make God a bad man? NO! it makes Him truthful.  It makes him real...if our children do wrong we punish them for a period of time...then we allow them to resume their lives...It's in God's timing and His timing is perfect.

Winds of Change

I've never really been one to cry.  I didn't cry at my dads funeral, I faked a cry at my step-dads funeral, I didn't cry at my wedding. As a matter of fact, I cannot think of a time when I have really cried about anything that you are "suppose" to cry about.  My one weakness is achievement.  I open up the tear gates when I see someone achieve something.  The Olympics are tough for me, watching a veteran player win a championship tears me up, and seeing someone overcome adversity will open up the flood gates.

Recently I have been paying particular attention to others who have achieved.  Reading Baron Batches blog has gotten to me.  No matter what happens in his NFL career he has achieved....

My cousin Mark, who gave up on a life of making serious money in real estate to influence the youth of today. 

Following Stewart Scott on Twitter and even through Chemo, He has a great attitude.  This dude is an achiever...

There are many many more.....

The reason my mind is on achievement is because I found this week my family is growing by 2.  My nephews age 3 and 5 are coming to live with me for an undisclosed amount of time.  It could be as little as 4 months or until high school graduation.  We are unsure.  These two boys are being raised by parents that remind me of my parents, drug addicted, abusive and unconcerned.  I see them and I see myself and wonder what did I do to overcome and achieve?  How did I become a success?  These are the questions that I need to ask before the arrival of our new additions.  How do I  teach them to be young mean of character? 

For the first time in forever I cried last night while laying in my hotel bed.  Some tears of joy, some of sadness, but I cried.  I thought about their future and how much influence I could have on them during their time with us.  I questioned how to raise these two boys and also spend quality time with my wife and daughters.  I prayed that we would be able to share our faith with these boys. 

I know all of these questions will be answered in God's timing.  For now, I know this....I saw the boys today and taught them how to get their guns up!  I told them they could ride a horse when they got here and explained that they will have their own beds when they come to our house.  I ask for your help Lord in giving us the strength to lead these boys so that years down the road, I will cry again because they have achieved.